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Archive for August, 2009

I realized today why teachers so often schedule tests on Fridays.  It allows them to day dream, such an easy Friday – just mentally gear up for the weekend.

Alas, I’m not a teacher – I have to turn in a draft of my dissertation today.  Just the methods, results, and figures for the computational part (though right now that constitutes 17 single spaced pages!) …  I detest writing this stuff, it shouldn’t take nearly as long as it does.  I spend half as much time dragging my feet about it as I do actually writing.  It’s just that I have so many other things to occupy my mind – wedding in 29 days (oh dear, not at all done with that to do list), frisbee every weekend, except for that one with my bachelorette party, all the things I want to do before we move…

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We went to Tybee last weekend (through Tuesday actually).  It was beautiful.  It is probably the last trip we will take while the ocean is swimmable.  I will miss the ocean, floating in the waves so long that when I finally get out my equilibrium is messed up, and I feel like I’m still going up an down for hours.  Boat rides, Fiance’s lovely parents, the way the marsh goes on forever in their back yard.  I hope we end up there when we are old, in that house his father built.

sunset in the backyard

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We went and got our marriage license and our wedding rings during our lunch break on Wednesday.  It was so easy.  All that stands between us and legal betrothal is the signature of a friend and a postage stamp.  It seems like the act of marriage should be more difficult, should require us to jump through more hoops.  But I guess the hard parts come after, continue to come forever and ever till death do us part.  I’m excited.

chasin some birdies

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Panic!

Ok, so as I might have mentioned, I am sort of intensely busy.  I am getting married in just over a month, writing my dissertation which needs to be handed in approximately two weeks after the wedding, which also happens to be when my first niece or nephew is due to exit from my sister-in-law.  Additionally, I play on a competitive ultimate team which has three weekend-long tournaments and several weekend-long practices between now and the beginning of October, all between 1.5 and 5 hours from where I live.  I am moving across the country in January, and am trying to maximize Fun Time with my friends and family who I may never see again ever (insert melodramatic music here).  So far, I have managed not to freak out, but I am starting to feel the tentacles of all-consuming panic pulling my feet towards an ocean of crazy.

This morning, my dear, dear fiance, under duress, admitted he had finally gotten in touch with our officiant, Officiant.  He is a friend from Fiance’s childhood, whom I do not know – I have met him once, and heard many stories, but we are not close ourselves.  For the last five months, I have been under the impression that I needn’t worry about the ceremony – Officiant has a plan, he has ideas, sure, Fiance will call him and get some details, sure, sure.  So I threw that issue on the back burner and focused on getting all the other little duckies in neat little rows, and occasionally nagged Fiance about calling.  This morning, I learn that Officiant has no plan.  In the last wedding he performed for friends, the neurotic bride (O, to be that sort of neurotic bride!) handed him his lines, which he embellished and made his own in small ways, but he originated none of the ceremony ideas.

I have not a damn clue what I want in our wedding ceremony.  Fiance will be of no help, unless I want an oral delineation of a computer program that will cause a robot to ramble about the hall, greeting the guests.  We know that there will not be any religion in the ceremony, but that’s really it.  I suppose it would be nice for someone to say something about how Fiance and I have a deep, special love, that is like … something strong and enduring.  Like rocks, or time.  I am not a poet, I am a scientist.  I have the vague notion that it would be lovely for someone to read something, but I don’t know what they ought to read, and how does one pull a meaningful passage out the ether if one has the memory of a goldfish?  I have read so many lovely things, but…. what were they?  Oh dear…

I wish that someone had the answers for this one.  I wish I could better vocalize what we all know, that we’ve got something special.  I wish it didn’t all sound so trite when you write it down.

this man

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State of the union

Earlier I was perusing the NYT and ran across an article (will link later) on Godwin’s Rule: the longer a Usenet thread, the closer the probability of one being compared to Hitler gets to 1. There was a video in the article of a woman explaining how Obama and Hitler are, to her, terrifyingly similar, and trying to kill certain portions of their respective citizenry. . .

I absolutely CANNOT wrap my head around what some people believe in this country. In the world. I cannot fathom who begins the absurd rumors about this shit, and to what end. I can’t understand the things Bush et al. foisted upon thus country, evoking little more than cries of “idiot!” Now an intelligent man tries to change an obviously and severely broken system, and he is called an elitist, a facist, a NAZI. I am terrified that some nutjob is going to assassinate our president, honestly thinking they are saving the world from evil.

What is there to gain from all this bullshit??

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1.  The harrowing process of becoming a Threadless t-shirt model.

2.  That the world was a yellow cupcake with purple frosting, and everyone drove sprinkle cars.

3.  I am cat.  I like to sleep on the floor, in the sunshine.

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One of my twittery friends turned me onto Track Your Happiness, a research project that aims to gather data on what, exactly, governs happiness.  After signing up, the website emails or text messages you a link to a survey three times a day.  The survey wants to know how you feel Right Then!  What are you doing?  Have you eaten/exercised/slept?  And etc.

I have some criticisms of the project – it targets iPhone users, as we happen to be attached to our devices and able to answer the surveys right away, yielding more applicable results.  This also means that the population they are gathering data about is not a representative sample – we are generally affluent, for instance.  Thus, the conclusions drawn from the data really only apply to um… iPhone users.  I’ll stop before my scientist brain gets too into this, but you get the idea.

Despite my criticisms, I have found the project to be very useful for me personally.  In answering the surveys and looking at the little bits of results they give me about my individual habits and happiness, I have realized some things:

1.  I am, by far, consistently happiest when I am busy and working towards a goal.  The only thing that so far compares to that level of joy is seeing an old, dear friend.

2. I am much less happy on the days when I procrastinate.

3.  Watching TV does nothing for me. Possibly because it makes me feel neither busy nor goal-oriented.

4.  I often sleep too much (9+ hours a night).  I know, that’s sort of criminal.

Some of those things sound obvious, but it’s cool to see them on a graph with semi-quantitative data about me.  Since I have started participating in this, I have been more goal-oriented about my work, and also about working out.  I have also been making an effort to consistently get 8 hours of good sleep, no more and no less.  And to not watch TV unless it’s a program I really enjoy (like the Daily Show, but not the Colbert Report) or something that I do while interacting with other people (like making fun of legitimately enjoying ABC Family shows with Fiance).

I still haven’t learned how to stop procrastinating, but I guess being aware of the consequences on my psyche is a good first step…

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Venus and Mars

I got a big red exercise ball last week.  I wanted to use it as a computer chair (which I am and it rules, except for how my skin sticks to it because it’s hot as BALLS here.  Ahem.), and also to start doing some strengthening exercises (crunches, push ups, squats, etc.) and I thought it might jumpstart me a bit.

It hasn’t.  Today I’m doing them no matter what, because summer league ended, and I ate an ice cream sandwich for breakfast, and I have to fit into my wedding dress in less than 2 months.  But that’s not the point.

The point is that last night while I was working at the computer (sitting in the actual computer chair), I realized that Fiance had sat down on the ball and immediately started doing crunches.  And then started doing push ups.  Like, he sees an exercise ball and it makes his brain go, “let’s work out!  this’ll be great!” whereas when I see one, my brain goes, “bouncy!  bounce bounce bounce.”

Gah.

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Soapbox

vennthat is all.

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